Love Letters......

Love letters.  These two words conjure up many visions and emotions, mostly of the romantic kind.  These are the letters from one lover to another expressing devotion, connection and never ending love. Some contain poems, others are sprayed with perfume, and many are sealed with a kiss but all in all, the message is the same, “I love you”.

  In recent years I have stumble upon many different types of love letters.  Not one of them arrived in an envelope, but the message was the same, it was one of love.

 A little over four years ago my Mother-in-law passed.  I must say I am one of the very fortunate people in this world to have two very loving and devoted Mothers; my Mother and my Mother-in-law.  The “in-law” designation is one that society places on the relationship to define the non-blood line connection, but without a doubt, Mom and I are connected!

This is what happened four years ago when I was at Mom’s house for her funeral……

My kids have always been picky or particular eaters.  You could put out a feast, but nothing would appeal to them.  They possessed the chicken nuggets, fries, pizza and grilled cheese type of palets.  So with all of the food dropped by the house, and none of it appealing to my children, I found myself in Mom’s kitchen making my son a grilled cheese sandwich. 

I stood in Mom’s kitchen with Mom’s things, pots, pans, knives, seasonings, cookbooks and utensils. I looked above at her copper bottom pots hanging from the pot rack above and I remembered all of the feasts that she created in them and, in that kitchen.  Mom was a Dietician by trade.  She was a woman nourished our bodies, but more importantly our souls. 

  As much as I was always comfortable in Mom’s house, without her there it seemed wrong.  I must have opened the silverware drawer hundreds of times before, but now I felt as if I was intruding, invading.  It wasn’t right or the same without her there.   Well, nothing was going to be the same.

  I suddenly found myself drawn to the refrigerator, not for its contents, but for the items that decorated the outside.  There were several magnets that held pictures of family, Doctor Appointment reminder cards, pizza delivery options, pictures drawn by her grandchildren and lists of things to do.  However, all that I focused on was a small square magnetic paper holder that served as a depository for notes and miscellaneous items. As I walked over to the refrigerator I was focused on one particular piece of paper in the small magnetic box.  It was about two thirds of the way back.  I pulled it out and opened it.  It must have been from a funeral service for a lost friend or loved one. However, it must have touched Mom so she kept it.  This is what was printed on that piece of paper:

When I am gone, release me, let me go. I have so many things to see and do.

You mustn't tie yourself to me with tears, be happy that we had so many years.

I gave you much love; you can only guess how much you gave to me in happiness.

I thank you for the love you each have shown, but now it's time I traveled on alone.

So grieve a while for me, if grieve you must, Then let your grief be comforted by trust.

It's only for a little while we must part. So bless the memories within your heart.

I won't be far away, for life goes on. So if you need me, call and I will come.

Though you can't see or touch me, I'll be near.

And if you listen with your heart, you'll hear

 All of my love around you soft and clear.

And then, when you must come this way alone, I'll greet you with a smile and "welcome home".

To this day I cannot tell you exactly why I picked to read that piece of paper versus the rest, but I do believe that I was meant to.  Mom wanted me to read it, and I knew I was to be the messenger.  She did not want us grieving.  She was content in her journey.  I shared it with my husband, his brother, sisters and a special niece of Mom’s.  It was a love letter from Mom to all of us…..no envelope necessary.

 Just a few weeks ago Mom sent another love letter.  Once again, I delivered it for her.  Mom’s niece, my husband’s cousin is going through a very difficult time.  Her twenty six year old son’s cancer was recently been labeled terminal.  I cannot imagine what she is going through as she nurses him through this.  I felt as if I needed to write her and lend my support, but I struggled mightily to find the words to do so. After many tears, the words flowed and I sent the message via Facebook. My note opened a dialog between us.  A few Friday nights ago while on Facebook she instant messaged me, this was just the second time since we have been on Facebook that we had a conversation this way.  Our conversation encompassed many feelings and ranges of emotions. 

 At one point I took a quick break and went to my kitchen to pour myself a glass of wine.  At that moment I said “Mom, please help me to find the words that will bring her a sense of comfort.”  I returned to my computer and the conversation continued.  After an hour or so of conversation we sent our love and signed off.  The very moment that we did so, a Facebook friend of mine posted a wall photo.  I stared it in amazement and chills ran through my body from head to toe!  I knew where the message came from and who it was intended for.  See, one thing I did not mention is that my Irish Mother-in-law was one of the strongest women that I have ever known.  She was sending a love letter for her niece.  I quickly attached the wall photo to a message and sent it to her.  I explained that as soon as we finished our conversation this appeared on my wall and I felt that I needed to send it to her.

  Her response was, “I think Peggy just sent that for me………” Yes she did, and…..no envelope required.

  So what do a piece of gum, a discarded piece of aluminum foil and a woodchip have in common? The answer is a love letter.

  I have a friend who was dealing with some difficulties this past fall.  She loves and connects with the image of a heart, especially when found in rocks.  Early in November I went out for a Saturday afternoon walk.  It was nice to get out since the prior week had been so difficult.  We had an unusual and unexpected late October snow storm that left us without power and many downed tree limbs.  This particular Saturday was comfortable and sunny, a perfect day for a walk.

  I ventured out not only to get some exercise, but also to think.  I find that when I walk, I clear my mind of clutter and focus on what is important to me.  My friend was weighing heavy on my mind that day.  I wished that there was some way that I could provide her with some relief and some comfort.  I was just a little over a mile into my walk when I suddenly looked down at the pavement and there it was a piece of gum with a very definite message…..

  I continued along, I had traveled just a hundred yards from the gum and there wedged between the curbing and the road was a discarded piece of aluminum foil.  I stared in disbelief at the shape that was cut from within….yes another message.

 Now I was nearing the end of my journey I was grateful for the messages that I had received and I knew that I would be forwarding them to my friend. Three miles into the walk and coming close to completion I once again I felt the need to look down and there it was a remnant from the prior week’s storm clean up; a woodchip with a message.

 Upon my return home I composed an e-mail to my long distance friend and included the picture of the gum, the aluminum foil and the woodchip. Once again I was the messenger delivering another love letter, with no envelope required.

 Just two weeks ago I received my own love letter, and no the postman did not deliver it.  As much as possible I try to use my lunch hours to get outside and take a walk.  It is not always easy to do, but when I can I find that this “recess” time renews and refreshes me. 

 It was a clear and sunny but equally cold and extremely windy, but I had the opportunity to get outside and that I did.  I was about eight minutes into my lunchtime walk the wind was whipping at my back and piercing my body.  I thought “Umm, not happening today, turn around and go back.” But this time I did not listen. I continued along my two mile trek.  As cold as it was, (and I do not like the cold) I found it very refreshing and more importantly, mind clearing.

 Refreshed but ready to warm up I rounded the final corner of my journey to decent back to the warm office.  However, as I did if felt compelled to take a picture, so I stopped, removed my glove and readied my cell phone.  I took the picture, put my glove back on my cold hand and took two more steps.  But I then again felt as if I needed to take another picture.  So I removed my glove, readied the cell phone and snapped….this is what I captured.

Yes, it was another love letter that was delivered without an envelope or a postage stamp.  This one is from the Universe to all of us. And it is sent with love………

Survivor Walk

   Years back I watched the reality television show “Survivor”.  The final show consisted of the three remaining contestants who were vying for the grand prize.  One of the rituals was for the last three participants to hike a trail of remembrance.  Along the way they would pass the extinguished torches of their former competitors. They would recall each person’s presence, contribution or quirky attributes.   I always loved that segment and the time of reflection.

   Today is the eve of a New Year and while out for my morning walk I found myself on my own “Survivor Walk”.  I was reliving the many moments that occurred during 2011.  Some were poignant, some were happy, a few painful, other were inspiring and then there were the ones that were peaceful and very comfortable.  However in each of these moments contained a lesson.

Here are some of the lessons that I was reminded of this past year…..

Life is full of beginnings and endings…. 

January was a full circle life month for my family.  On January 11^th my sister gave birth to an amazing little boy.  My nephew possesses the bluest eyes, a huge smile and holds so much promise for the future.  There is truly no feeling in this world that compares to cuddling an infant.  They possess the scent of purity, innocence and promise.  Cradling my nephew brought me back to the birth of my children.  Years have a way of fading feelings, but pick up a new born and you are instantly and magically transported back in time to the moment when you first held your own child.

 Our family was doubly blessed on January 12^th when my cousin gave birth to a little girl.

  After these joyous occasions and celebrations of new life, on January 13^th my Grandmother departed this world.  As much as the family was grateful that she did not suffer a prolonged illness, her last few months were that of transitioning. All through her life she had a difficult time expressing it, but my Grandmother possessed much love in her heart.  I thank her for always speaking her mind, sometimes to a fault, but her ability to say what she truly thought was never lost on me.   I am striving to do more of that.

  Life is circular, new beginnings and inevitable endings.  Ebbs and flows.

The Power of Nature……

  The past few years I have been drawn outdoors.  Mother Nature’s theater never seems to disappoint. The show is always spectacular.   During 2011 I have walked many miles admiring the sky, the birds, the trees, the flowers, the sun and the moon. 

  I have listened to our neighborhood owl usher in the new day.

  This past year I have enjoyed many a peaceful kayak paddles along the river and upon the lake.  I have been guided along my journey by a swan and called out by the reflective powers of the Universe. 

  I have sat upon my favorite thinking spot in the world, a rock jetty on a Cape Cod beach and have ponder life while the tide crashed along the rocks and then gently met the shore.

                                     

   One Sunday morning in June I joined a likeminded group of folks and ventured up Black Rock Mountain for a meditative walk.  It was a time to push myself beyond what I thought I could achieve and before you knew it I was standing at the top of the mountain.  The morning sun was shining and I was standing in the spot where the mountains kiss the sky. It is difficult to find the words that adequately express the beauty I witnessed. Suffice it to say, that Sunday morning I attended services in God’s Cathedral.

  I have watched from my window within my warm home as the winter snow blanketed the ground. Her protective coating of white covered all that was within her sight.  The message is clear.  Slow down, relax, remain centered, be peaceful and calm.

Mother Nature has a way of speaking to us.  She keeps us centered and grounded.  Remember to listen….

When you are tired and think you are done for the day… push yourself a bit…….

   Sometimes an invitation arrives after the fact and you just have to respond YES.  This happened a few times to me during 2011.

  One such time this occurred was on July 9^th.  My sister had invited me to a local vineyard for some wine, music and fun.  As tired as I was that day, I said yes.  I packed my car with lawn chairs and bug spray and off I went.  My older sister has always been my guide, my rock and a keeper of my soul.  She spoke for me at an early age and championed me during my latter years. Soon she would be remarrying and moving to another state so I felt this was my opportunity to spend some one on one time together.

  I arrived at the Vineyard first.  I waited in my car for my sister to arrive.  Soon thereafter she did, and she had hoops in hand!  My sister teaches hoop dancing.  For us lay people, this is like doing the hula hoop.

  We set up our chairs, sprayed ourselves generously with bug spray and purchased a few bottles of wine.  A bottle of red for me, and a bottle of white for her along with two souvenir wine glasses.  We talked and talked and then talked a bit more.  The music was playing and it became more inviting.  So off my sister went to hoop a bit.  Before you knew it she had a following.  She is the Pied Piper of hooping!  I loved watching my sister.  She was living within her element and sharing joy! Not to mention that she gave a twelve year old girl a hoop to take home.  Magical was the word that described the night.

                                  

  I so enjoyed my night out with my sister.  I am very glad that I did not let the exhaustion overtake me and rob me of this experience.  I knew that in a few months my sister would be living several hundreds of miles away and I would not have such an opportunity at my fingertips.

Don’t underestimate the impact you have on someone……..

   Taking a few moments from your day to send a quick e-mail to someone may seem insignificant in the big scheme of things.  I never expected me doing so would merit such an honor.  In the fall I experienced my full circle moment. The one in which I realized that my words, deeds and actions affected the life of someone else.

 The past few years I have been attending a bi-weekly mediation group.  Meditation is a wonderful way to clear the clutter from your mind.  Along the way I have met several wonderful people.  Many of whom I am happy to call my friends.

  After eight months or so attending the meditation group I met a young woman.  She was confident, but a bit disenchanted.  She had written a book but was unable to find a publisher.  She knew it was a meaningful story, one that could assist others.  It was her experience as a thirteen year old when she lost her brother to suicide.  I felt for her, believed in her and encouraged her to stay the course.  I would send quotes of encouragement and publishing options I came across on the Internet.   This year she found a local publisher to showcase her work.

  I never realized the extent of my impact upon her.  We met for lunch this past fall.  It was the first and only time that we have met for lunch since I have known her.  After sharing much conversation and wonderful food she presented me with a copy of her book.  I was thrilled to hold her words within my hands.  However I was not prepared for what she revealed to me on the thanks and acknowledgements page…..there it was in black and white, my name.  Blown away…, without a doubt….you could have knocked me over with a feather!  Never in all my days did I feel as if I did anything to warrant such an honor. She also included a handwritten was a note of thanks.  Once again proving, never underestimate the impact that you can have on someone life……

Be kind to Others…..

  Remember, be kind to others.  Treat people the way that you want to be treated.  I have always subscribed to this belief but this past July this message spoke to me and unexpectedly returned a gift.

  While grocery shopping in Walmart on July 3^rd I was drawn to a certain checkout line and encountered a cashier who seemed sad and upset.  While packing my groceries I began a conversation with her and she opened up to me.  She was dealing with her own difficulties and I offered some comfort, support and a tiny bit of wisdom.  I understood her. I myself had struggled with similar difficulties. Upon my return home I could not shake our conversation and her sorrow.  I drove back to the store with a book for her, one that had helped me.  Never, ever did I imagine that this encounter would inspire me in such a way.  The next day I wrote my first blog.  I began to let go of the fear that I harbored about others perception of my words or their rejection.  My compassion for another enabled me to open my wings a bit and begin to fly within the world of the written word. 

 Be kind to others you never know what may lie around the corner….

Every Once in a While, Put Yourself First….

  Ahhhh….this is one of the more difficult lessons for us to learn.  However, every once in a while we do need to put ourselves, our desires and more importantly our dreams first.  September of 2011 I finally did it!  Armed with the generosity of my sister who gave me enough frequent flyer miles for an airline ticket to Phoenix Arizona I was headed out west for an adventure in Sedona. Sedona is known for its vibrant red rocks but more importantly the ability to awaken and renew your soul.   And awaken I did!  I spent five glorious days in peace.  I met many new people and pushed myself well beyond what I thought I could possibly do.   I have written much about this journey on this blog so I will not repeat it, but I will say this.  It was the first time that I truly put myself first and in doing so I renewed my spirit and opened my heart and mind to new possibilities. 

2011 Life Lessons…….

   I was coming to the end of my Survivor walk; I rounded the corner and headed toward my home. My thoughts turned towards gratitude.  This year I have watched more fireflies and hummingbirds.  I have seen more rainbows and shooting stars than ever before.  These are gifts that remind me of the beauty that surrounds me. I have spent time with many wonderful people.  I have learned so much from them.

 As I say goodbye to 2011 and hello to 2012 I remind myself that each moment is a gift.  Every moment contains unlimited potential, however I must choose the way in which I live them and experience them.  In 2012 I must continue to expand upon the lessons learned this past year. Focus on the positive rather than on the negative. Let go of the things that are out of my control and expend my energy on those things that I can affect. Seek out the beauty in my surroundings.  Take time for myself, dance, laugh, and love………..

  May 2012 be a year of health, happiness, love laughter and realized dreams for us all……… 

  As I was getting ready to publish this blog I noticed I had a text message.  I read “Meeting at Black Rock at 11:15 for a hike r u in?” The message was from a friend from meditation, the one who organized the June hike.  By the time I read the message it was 10:50.  I hurried around my friend said that they would wait for me. 

 Already a fabulous start to 2012, a hike up a beautiful mountain on an unseasonably warm winter day, in the company of three wonderful kindred spirits……..

A One Minute Lesson

Earlier this week a quick look at the calendar invoked a panic attack.  It is mid-December, Christmas is less than two weeks away and I still have so much to do.  Work has been so busy and has consumed not only my days but several hours of my recent nights that I find myself behind on my Christmas preparations.  So I decided to take one of my remaining three vacation days yesterday in the hopes of getting much of my holiday shopping done. Not really what I consider a vacation day, but necessary. 

 With list in hand I left my house by ten o’clock.  I made a quick stop at my parent’s house to borrow Mom’s “30% off” Kohls coupon.  My first three stops of the day, Kohls, Michaels and Modells were successful.  Next on the list was BJ’s I needed to pick up a few things for the week.  While I was there I also picked up a fresh cut pine decorated wreath and a few poinsettias. I paid for the items and proceeded to the exit.

  If you have ever shopped in BJ’s you know that you must produce you receipt at the exit so that the clerk can verify that the contents of your cart matches the items on the receipt.  The process usually moves quickly.  For the most part people are prepared for this ritual.  However, yesterday the customer in front of me at the exit was not.

  Standing in front of me was a short elderly gentleman.  As he approached the clerk she asked him for his receipt.  He checked one pocket, then the next and next, then back to the first and second.   Finally he found it. He struggled to wrap his fingers around the strip of paper.  The clerk sighed and rolled her eyes.  I too found myself getting annoyed.  I still had to Walmart, Target and Home Goods on my list of stores to still visit.  I was hoping that I would be home early enough to beat the setting sun and go out for a meditative walk.  “Come on!” I said to myself.

  And as quickly as that thought crossed my mind I slapped myself back into reality.  How could I be so thoughtless and self-centered?  Does it really matter that I will get to Walmart a minute or two later than I thought? This man could have easily been one of my family members.  Would I want them to be treated as such? 

  The clerk checked the receipt and handed it back to the gentleman.  It took him a few moments to put the slip back into his pocket. He proceeded to push his cart out of the store.  I stopped to watch him.  He walked slowly and was impeded by a limp.  For all I know this shopping trip took so much of his energy. One day if I am fortunate to live a long life my body too will start to betray me.  I will not be able to move at the same rate of speed or with the same steady footedness and strength as I do today.

 Like each of us this man has a story of his own. He may be someone’s husband, father or grandfather, a man that his family adores. He may have spent years of his life working as a laborer, a businessman, or a fireman. He may have been a community leader or a volunteer. My thoughts about his life are conjecture, but one thing I know for sure is he lived much of his life in a world that is very different from the one we live in today.

    He lived in a time of patience.  Meals were not heated in a few minutes in the microwave; they were slowly cooked with farm fresh ingredients. Letters were hand written and sent via the Postal Service. They took days to arrive. Now messages are quickly typed (many with one letter abbreviations for full words) and they are delivered to electronic mail boxes in just moments.  Families sat together daily and shared meals and conversation.  A sense of community was commonplace.  Town parades and celebrations were an event.  During the holiday season so many people looked forward to shopping in Main Street’s family owned business. It was the only place to shop, not the mega malls of today.

  All of those years ago Christmas was about being thankful for the food on the table, the roof over your head and the loved ones that you shared it with.  It was about abundance of the heart not of possessions.  How have we lost focus on what is truly important?  Why do we stress about making sure that the newest game system or I Pad is under the tree? 

  Ashamed and remorseful for my initial reaction I loaded my purchases into the car and headed to Walmart.  I love how life gives you second chances.  As I rounded the corner and entered the isle in Walmart that contained baking supplies I saw a middle aged woman with her cart.  In her cart was a cane.  As I passed her she inadvertently pushed her cart into the free standing display of pumpkin pie kits.  Several fell to the floor.  Realizing that the task of restacking these items may be a challenge for her I backed up my cart and returned to that spot.  She was attempting to bend down.  I started picking up the boxes.  I said, “I’ve got this Ma’am.”   She thanked me and when I finished I continued with my shopping.  Lending this helping hand took no more than forty seconds, but lightened her load by tons.

  And sometimes life gives you third chances.  After Walmart I shopped in Target and as I was walking towards Home Goods I passed the Dollar Store.  I noticed an older woman with a cart standing inside of the store at the exit door.  I was not planning on going into the store, but I stopped and opened the door for her to exit.  As I did she smiled and said, “Thank you!  I did not know how I was going to open that heavy door.”

 Truth be told, everyday there are many opportunities to share a smile, show kindness or lend a helping hand to one another.  The problem is we rush through our days with blinders on.  I am so very grateful for my one minute lesson at BJ’s.  It reminded me of the true spirit of Christmas.  We are to embrace the feeling of this season. It is to carry throughout the year. Keep in your mind and close to heart these words…….peace on earth and goodwill toward all. 

Oh, Christmas Tree

Oh! Christmas Tree

   Once again it is the Christmas season.  Glad tidings and good will to all is our mantra this month.  During the last four weeks of the year peace is to fill this land, seep into our hearts and carry us throughout the upcoming year.  After all, isn’t that what the advertising executives tell us should happen!  It is a time of family togetherness.  Shopping, baking, wrapping and decorating are all on the “to do” list. Traditions and decorations abound.

 Life has a way of creeping up on us and reconfiguring your life at a faster pace than you can embrace it. Today, for the first time in nineteen or so years my husband I decorated the Christmas tree by ourselves.  Our daughter will be twenty one this spring and is currently studying at a College out of state.  Our son who is fifteen was awaiting a video stream that was so very important to him to see.  That meant that neither of our children was available to participate in the annual family Christmas decorating festivities. However, our son did take pity on his old Mom and assisted with the ceremonial passing of the boxes and plastic bins from the attic. He did do the heavy lifting so to speak!

 Our tree is an artificial one that I garnered over twenty five years ago from my first job out of College.  I worked for a company that manufactured artificial Christmas trees.  At the time, I was fortunate to acquire a tree from one of the top selling lines.  Through the years it has served us very well, however these past few years she is showing her age….I guess, she is much like me!  So today, once again my husband and I set up the only Christmas tree that our children have opened their presents around on every Christmas morning of their lives.

    It was odd.  It was quiet. It was a full circle moment.  I was transported back to our first Christmas together.  We had decorated the Christmas tree with much anticipation of the joy of the season and in hope of what our future may hold.  

  Today, as we unpacked each box of tree ornaments the layers of our lives unfolded before us.  Unlike our first years together, our lives were now weaved together in a tapestry that told our family story. Each box we opened  contained Christmas tree ornaments that told a story, sparked a memory, reminded us of a loved one,  contained some magic and held a history all of their own.  Our Christmas tree is decorated with basketballs and ballerinas for our daughter.  Tigger from Winnie the Pooh reminds us of our son.  He would bounce around the house just like Tigger when he was little and there are many ornaments to prove it!

 Our tree also has a few mauve Christmas bulbs with gray writing that announced our marriage that took place in October of 1988.   Since I worked for a company that manufactured Christmas trees and ornaments I thought this would make a perfect wedding favor.  The mauve color matched the bridesmaid’s dresses and the groomsmen’s cumber buns. The gray also matched the color of the groomsmen’s tuxedos.  Each year we hang this ornament on our tree and I know that so many family members and friends do the same. For sure, the past twenty three years our Christmas tree has displayed this same announcement and message.

We have handmade ornaments from pre-school projects. 

There are the loving handmade notes from a young girl presented to her parents a Christmas several years ago.

It contains a few of my Grandmothers glass ornaments that we gingerly place upon the branches each year.  I have one of my Grandmother’s golden pinecones that doubled as hand grenade during the war years for my Dad and his brother.  Each of these wonderful items and memories bind one generation to the next.

 I have seen the Christmas trees that contain uniform decorations. The ribbons, bows and icicles are color coordinated.  Each component resides in their predetermined location. These trees are truly elegant and breathtaking.  As beautiful they are, to me, they are missing something.  Personality. Uniform is the last word you would use to describe our family Christmas tree. 

 So, this year after our tree was filled with ornaments and lights I retreated to my room and removed the bubble wrap from a treasure.  It was a Christmas ornament that I purchased  in September while I was in Sedona Arizona.  It is a small, elegant angel adorned in purple. She reminds me of what I discovered within those red rocks….bliss!

  As I placed the ornament upon the tree branch I knew that this too has become a part of our family story, more importantly, my story.  I believe that many years from now, one of my children will be gingerly placing this angel on a branch of their family Christmas tree.  As they do, they will be reminded of the time many years ago when their Mother gave herself a gift.   It was a gift of peacfulness and discovery in a place of amazing beauty. 

  And so I wish this same feeling of freedom and bliss for my children, my family and my friends!  During this Christmas season may you be reminded of the joy in your life. May it always hold a place in your heart.

The Christmas Ties that Bind...

Watching The Grinch with my kids! My very own little Cindy Lou Who is loving it! I love Christmas! 

 This post appeared on my Facebook wall on November 28^th.  These words were spoken by my cousin’s wife.  They have three children under the age of ten.  The youngest is a girl, a.k.a. Cindy Lou Who. She has blond hair that is pulled back in pigtails, and a smile and sweetness to match the character.   On my face and in my heart a smile instantly appeared when I read this. I was transported back in time.  I too sat with my children enjoying the exact same show.  They would be in their pajamas, of course the kind with the sewn in feet, and I would pop the popcorn for the show.  It was an event, a happening. One of those very special evenings when the regular routine was ignored and we would be transported to a magical world.  I would savor every minute of the show and our time together.

   It seems as if as soon as the Thanksgiving turkey is carved, the television schedule is announced that contains all of the special Christmas shows.  We all know them.  They may be in Cartoon or Claymation form, but we can recite every line, and sing every song. Our hearts are warmed when Santa asks Rudolph to guide his sleigh on the snowy and foggy night, when the Grinch returns Christmas and all the trimmings to the residents of Who Ville, we love to discover how Santa came to town, we were so very happy when Santa was able to recover from his sick bed to deliver Christmas after all, and our hearts melted when Linus took the stage to explain the true meaning of Christmas.

  Not only did I enjoy watching these shows with my children, but I enjoyed watching the same ones with my sisters when I was growing up.  And in our house these shows were also an event.  We had to have all of our homework completed, be bathed and in our pajamas by the show start time.  Mom would make the popcorn, but not in the microwave.  She popped it on the stove top, the old fashioned way.

 Back in the day there were no VCR, DVD or TiVo’s to record the shows for future viewing. They were truly a once a year event. I remember one particular snowy and windy night back in the late 1960’s or early 1970’s.  My sisters and I kept up our end of the bargain.  Our homework was completed and we were squeaky clean from our baths, we turned on the television and we were horrified to see nothing but snow.  Not the white fluffy kind, but the black and white snow that filled the TV screen!  It was not just on channel 2, but on each of the eleven remaining channels!  The only thing that this could mean was that there was a problem with our TV and or, our antenna.

  Panic ensued in our house.  When was Daddy getting home from work?  We all knew that Dad was the “Mighty Man of Steel” and he could fix anything, but would he be home in time?  Would we be able to see Rudolph this year?  We have waited all year for this hallowed night. How could the winds blow down our TV antenna on such a special night?

  Well as luck would have it, Dad arrived home to rescue his daughters.  There was no time for dinner, not with such a crisis at hand.  So out into the cold and wind Dad ventured as he climbed onto the roof.  The only thing that he asked is that we told him when we could see the picture on the TV.  

  With the same determination that Rudolph had as he guided Santa’s Sleigh, Dad possessed the same as he ventured out to splice those wires so his girls could have their once a year magical journey.  To the roof Dad went.  The wind was whipping in circles at the top of the mountain, and also on the top of our roof.  Frozen fingers and all Dad spiced the wires together.  He yelled to his family in the warm house to see if it worked….no response, so he yelled again, and again, no response….finally he secured the wire connections with the electrical tape  and entered the house, only to find his girls huddled on the couch, sharing popcorn and enthralled watching Rudolph!   Mission accomplished!!  That particular night has gone down in history, our family history, that is!

   I have such fond memories of watching the “Grinch Who Stole Christmas”,  “The Year Without a Santa Claus”, Santa Claus is Coming to Town”, and A Charlie Brown Christmas” with my sisters.  To this day we still sing the songs and recite the words.  With just a single note of “Santa Clause is Coming to Town”, or “I’m Mr. Heat Miser, I’m Mr. Snow” I am transported back to two places, my childhood and my children’s childhoods. 

   So very many years later, these shows still mean so much to me.  The really amazing thing is,all of these forty and fifty year old Christmas specials mean the same if not more to my children.  So the circle is complete….and in the future we go!  For some reason I do believe that these same Christmas shows will resonate in much of the same way with my Grandchildren.

   We live in the century of cutting edge technology.  Animation is now considered an art form and you can even major in it at college.  What can be created with computer graphics astounds me.  And yet these Claymation and Cartoon Christmas specials created forty to fifty years ago are still generational favorites.  They continue to resonate with the older and younger generations.  Timeless is the word!

   It seems as the years progress, the madness increases.  We are overcome with the “must haves”, the “you cannot live with outs.”  And like Charlie Brown I shout “Isn’t there anyone who knows what Christmas is really all about?”  We need to continue to listen to Linus.  In this world of beauty, messages abound…… Linus recited to us that the true meaning of Christmas is: “Glory to God in the highest and on earth, peace and goodwill towards all men.”.........Merry Christmas and may your heart continue to hold Christmas joy today, and all of your tomorrows. 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BeVDOu2_Fuc&feature=related

Creamed Onions.......

 As the brightly colored leaves fall from the tree branches around us I am reminded that Thanksgiving is rapidly approaching.  It is one of my favorite holidays. This holiday is simply about being together with our family and friends.  The advertisers are not inundating us with suggestions of things we must purchase by the fourth Thursday of November.  The stores are not filled with isles of Thanksgiving decorations for us to buy. This holiday is about nourishment.  It is nourishment not only of the body, but also of the soul.  We are reminded of our connection. And these connections run deep, from generation to generation.

 

  We all have at least one chair at our Thanksgiving table that is no longer occupied.  It may be a recent loss or one from many years ago.  Regardless of the timing the void is the same and its scar is apparent.  This year at my family Thanksgiving table there will be one less adult dining with us. But as fate has it, we now have a child’s high chair to add to the mix. We celebrate this new life that is with us and cherish the one that is no longer sitting at our table.

  I remember the Thanksgivings when I was a child.  We would go to my Grandparents house.  The table was extended well into the living room to accommodate the crowd.  Grandparents, parents, aunts, uncles, cousins and family friends all had a place.   As my sisters, cousins and I played house in my Grandmothers small utility room. The men watched football and the women prepared the feast. The table would be overflowing with food that not only looked delicious, but also smelled wonderful!  There were so many fancy dishes that displayed the dinner and a ceramic turkey bowl that my parents had purchased from Woolworths for five dollars (a large sum of money in the 1960’s) to house the mashed potatoes. Among the turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes and trimmings somewhere on the table were the creamed onions.  Creamed onions were a once a year happening.  As a young child they did not appeal to my eye or my palate, but none the less, they were part of our family Thanksgiving and the adults sure raved about them!

 As the years progressed, my Grandmother no longer possessed the physical energy to prepare such a feast for so many.   In addition, my Grandparents house could no longer accommodate our growing clan.  So my parents took over.  Thanksgiving dinner was now served at the “19 Club” our house.

 The family members who dined together on Thanksgiving may have changed, but mashed potatoes served from the ceramic turkey and the creamed onions remained a constant. Each year Mom prepared the creamed onions, and each year they were devoured. 

    As time went on, I completed high school and college and Mom continued to serve Thanksgiving dinner at our home. Each year, and each dinner conveyed its own message, its own flavor, but throughout all of them the creamed onions were a constant at our family table. 

  Life has a way of creeping up on us. One moment I was a child at the Thanksgiving table joking around, next I was a young adult and somehow and someway I suddenly garnered the title of adult.  With a blink of an eye I found myself not only a participant in the meal, but also I was expected to be a contributing chef to the feast!

    The second year of my marriage we traveled to Western Pennsylvania to spend it with my husband’s family.  As much as I was attempting to garner my position and figure out where I fit within my new family, my Mother-in-law simply and purely cemented it.  I was one of her children.  It did not matter if I arrived through birth or through marriage; I was a part of her tribe.  So when I arrived at Mom’s home a little out of sorts for Thanksgiving, she gave me free range.  Whatever I wanted to contribute to the meal was just fine with her!  From such an early stage in our relationship it was known that that the “in-law” designation did not fit.  It was simply mother and daughter. 

  That first Thanksgiving in Western PA my husband and I armed with the creamed onion recipe scoured the grocery stores for white boiling onions.  These are the type of onions that are essential for making creamed onions.   After many visits to every grocery store in town, we found a few baskets of very, very small white onions; they would work and did the trick.  Creamed onions now resided on my husband’s family Thanksgiving table…..and I must say they were very well received…..especially by my new Mom! Each successive year, creamed onions were my contribution.  Although, now I purchased the onions at our local apple orchard and brought them with me to Pennsylvania!

 Life continues to meander along its path.  Due to my daughter’s basketball obligations we did not travel to Pennsylvania for Thanksgiving for several years.  And as life has it, my Mother-in-Law no longer dwells with us upon this earth.  A mere three weeks after her passing we had quiet and intimate family Thanksgiving.  My parents and sisters were spending the holiday abroad, in Ireland; we on the other hand were trying to reconfigure our lives within our new reality.  For the first time we fried a turkey had the trimmings, and without a doubt the menu included creamed onions.

Thereafter, Thanksgiving was held at my sister’s home.  She had moved back to the New York area a few years prior and had now had garnered a job as the Barn Manager on a beautiful farm/estate in Westchester County.  Although her living space was limited, she welcomed our extended family to her home. We gathered in a pure and beautiful place to celebrate life, all of our blessings and our connections.  These were truly magical Thanksgivings. And each celebration was accompanied with the creamed onions that continued to have their place of prominence the menu, along with all of the love!

 

 Life reconfigures. This year my sister has remarried and is adjusting to her new life in another state.  We will be having a small family Thanksgiving at my parent’s home.  Our table will be set for ten which includes the newest addition to our family who loves to eat with his hands!  Not one of us has a crystal ball and knows what will occur or change from this Thanksgiving to the next.  However, once again our table will be set with love, memories and the creamed onions.

 Whether or not creamed onions entice your palate is not the important.  For my family they are the constant, the known entity on Thanksgiving.  The creamed onions are simply a thread that sew together the memories.   They are a connection to the generations that preceded us and to those that will succeed us.   We will always be connected.  Life's journey is not simply about where you have been, or where you are going, but where you have come from.  Our roots define us.  They are the compass to our future. 

  Whatever dish may be the constant at your family Thanksgiving table, savor it and enjoy it for yet another year.  May it nourish and sustain you and your family today, tomorrow and thereafter!   Happy Thanksgiving!