As the brightly colored leaves fall from the tree branches around us I am reminded that Thanksgiving is rapidly approaching. It is one of my favorite holidays. This holiday is simply about being together with our family and friends. The advertisers are not inundating us with suggestions of things we must purchase by the fourth Thursday of November. The stores are not filled with isles of Thanksgiving decorations for us to buy. This holiday is about nourishment. It is nourishment not only of the body, but also of the soul. We are reminded of our connection. And these connections run deep, from generation to generation.
We all have at least one chair at our Thanksgiving table that is no longer occupied. It may be a recent loss or one from many years ago. Regardless of the timing the void is the same and its scar is apparent. This year at my family Thanksgiving table there will be one less adult dining with us. But as fate has it, we now have a child’s high chair to add to the mix. We celebrate this new life that is with us and cherish the one that is no longer sitting at our table.
I remember the Thanksgivings when I was a child. We would go to my Grandparents house. The table was extended well into the living room to accommodate the crowd. Grandparents, parents, aunts, uncles, cousins and family friends all had a place. As my sisters, cousins and I played house in my Grandmothers small utility room. The men watched football and the women prepared the feast. The table would be overflowing with food that not only looked delicious, but also smelled wonderful! There were so many fancy dishes that displayed the dinner and a ceramic turkey bowl that my parents had purchased from Woolworths for five dollars (a large sum of money in the 1960’s) to house the mashed potatoes. Among the turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes and trimmings somewhere on the table were the creamed onions. Creamed onions were a once a year happening. As a young child they did not appeal to my eye or my palate, but none the less, they were part of our family Thanksgiving and the adults sure raved about them!
As the years progressed, my Grandmother no longer possessed the physical energy to prepare such a feast for so many. In addition, my Grandparents house could no longer accommodate our growing clan. So my parents took over. Thanksgiving dinner was now served at the “19 Club” our house.
The family members who dined together on Thanksgiving may have changed, but mashed potatoes served from the ceramic turkey and the creamed onions remained a constant. Each year Mom prepared the creamed onions, and each year they were devoured.
As time went on, I completed high school and college and Mom continued to serve Thanksgiving dinner at our home. Each year, and each dinner conveyed its own message, its own flavor, but throughout all of them the creamed onions were a constant at our family table.
Life has a way of creeping up on us. One moment I was a child at the Thanksgiving table joking around, next I was a young adult and somehow and someway I suddenly garnered the title of adult. With a blink of an eye I found myself not only a participant in the meal, but also I was expected to be a contributing chef to the feast!
The second year of my marriage we traveled to Western Pennsylvania to spend it with my husband’s family. As much as I was attempting to garner my position and figure out where I fit within my new family, my Mother-in-law simply and purely cemented it. I was one of her children. It did not matter if I arrived through birth or through marriage; I was a part of her tribe. So when I arrived at Mom’s home a little out of sorts for Thanksgiving, she gave me free range. Whatever I wanted to contribute to the meal was just fine with her! From such an early stage in our relationship it was known that that the “in-law” designation did not fit. It was simply mother and daughter.
That first Thanksgiving in Western PA my husband and I armed with the creamed onion recipe scoured the grocery stores for white boiling onions. These are the type of onions that are essential for making creamed onions. After many visits to every grocery store in town, we found a few baskets of very, very small white onions; they would work and did the trick. Creamed onions now resided on my husband’s family Thanksgiving table…..and I must say they were very well received…..especially by my new Mom! Each successive year, creamed onions were my contribution. Although, now I purchased the onions at our local apple orchard and brought them with me to Pennsylvania!
Life continues to meander along its path. Due to my daughter’s basketball obligations we did not travel to Pennsylvania for Thanksgiving for several years. And as life has it, my Mother-in-Law no longer dwells with us upon this earth. A mere three weeks after her passing we had quiet and intimate family Thanksgiving. My parents and sisters were spending the holiday abroad, in Ireland; we on the other hand were trying to reconfigure our lives within our new reality. For the first time we fried a turkey had the trimmings, and without a doubt the menu included creamed onions.
Thereafter, Thanksgiving was held at my sister’s home. She had moved back to the New York area a few years prior and had now had garnered a job as the Barn Manager on a beautiful farm/estate in Westchester County. Although her living space was limited, she welcomed our extended family to her home. We gathered in a pure and beautiful place to celebrate life, all of our blessings and our connections. These were truly magical Thanksgivings. And each celebration was accompanied with the creamed onions that continued to have their place of prominence the menu, along with all of the love!
Life reconfigures. This year my sister has remarried and is adjusting to her new life in another state. We will be having a small family Thanksgiving at my parent’s home. Our table will be set for ten which includes the newest addition to our family who loves to eat with his hands! Not one of us has a crystal ball and knows what will occur or change from this Thanksgiving to the next. However, once again our table will be set with love, memories and the creamed onions.
Whether or not creamed onions entice your palate is not the important. For my family they are the constant, the known entity on Thanksgiving. The creamed onions are simply a thread that sew together the memories. They are a connection to the generations that preceded us and to those that will succeed us. We will always be connected. Life's journey is not simply about where you have been, or where you are going, but where you have come from. Our roots define us. They are the compass to our future.
Whether or not creamed onions entice your palate is not the important. For my family they are the constant, the known entity on Thanksgiving. The creamed onions are simply a thread that sew together the memories. They are a connection to the generations that preceded us and to those that will succeed us. We will always be connected. Life's journey is not simply about where you have been, or where you are going, but where you have come from. Our roots define us. They are the compass to our future.
Whatever dish may be the constant at your family Thanksgiving table, savor it and enjoy it for yet another year. May it nourish and sustain you and your family today, tomorrow and thereafter! Happy Thanksgiving!
