The Gratitude Jar

At the beginning of 2014 I began a gratitude jar.  The concept is that each time during the year when something occurs that touches your heart write it down on a slip of paper and put it in the jar.  On the last day of the year open the jar and read all of the moments you documented.  I was proud of myself that I continued the practice throughout the year.  There was an entry from January 2^nd as well as one from December 29^th.

  As the minutes of 2014 were ticking away I lit a candle, poured a glass of wine, sat near the flickering lights of the Christmas tree. I opened the jar.  It was a small canning jar that had originally housed homemade pesto sauce from a co-worker. The jar was tightly filled with the slips of paper.  Slowly I began pulling the papers from the jar.  Each varied in size.  Some contained a sentence or two while others were a half a page or so.   

  Many of the entries were fresh in my mind while others I had totally forgotten about.  Here is some of what I found:

   I traveled. There was the family reunion in Ocean City, MD, a weekend getaway to Gettysburg, PA, a spring time camping trip at Truro MA, two fun evenings in New York City, a weekend spent with my daughter in Virginia, a summer beach vacation in Cape Cod and a return trip to Montana for a writing retreat.  I guess I did get around a bit in 2014!

 Family milestones were celebrated.  My son graduated from high school and a few months later he went off to college.  My daughter secured her first full time teaching job and my niece got married.

 Some of the moments were comical.  Two non-crafty friends trying to re-hang curtains brought some good belly laughs! (No worries HGTV, we won’t be overthrowing the Property Brothers in the lineup anytime soon!)  Or the time when my friend picked me up for a major league baseball game and when I open the front door and looked at her we both began laughing uncontrollably.  We were twins.  Each dressed in the same royal blue team shirt and grey shorts!

 There was a Lionel Richie concert under the stars, snowshoeing escapades, kayaking jaunts, hikes and campfires.  There was an entry about a friend who saw my Facebook post about going to Barnes & Noble on my lunch hour to pick up a newly released book and she came to meet me there for a cup of tea!

 Now onto the food, let’s say it is apparent where these extra pounds came from!  I shared numerous insightful conversations with my family and friends over many breakfasts, lunches and dinners. Not to mention the food at the ball park.  Maybe the cheese steak sandwich, garlic parmesan chicken wings and beer wasn’t the healthiest choice, but boy was it good!

      I savored the moment on each slip of paper before moving onto the next. I would close my eyes and revisited the scene.  Many times I could remember how the sun was shining or the wind was blowing and sometimes I didn’t. But in every instance I remembered how someone else made me feel.

   With each memory the paper pile grew, and grew. I sat back and looked at the overflowing stack in front of me.  How did all of that fit in the one little jar?  It was as if the jar was one of those vacuum space bags that you suck all of the air out of.  You know the kind that you place and a folded bed comforter that is a foot and a half high and after a few minutes with a vacuum extracting the air it is six inches tall.  When I opened that jar the memories came to life once more. 

 Tired and with a grateful heart I left my pile on the table and went to sleep.

 

 The next morning I revisited those slips of paper.  The accountant in me appeared. I counted the number of entries and I charted the people involved in each one.  Sixty three was the number of moments I documented.  There were twenty seven different peopled involved.  Ironically, the moments involving my children were equal!  Whew!  I wouldn’t want to be accused of favoritism!

  I concluded from my analysis that there are three hundred and sixty five days in the year and I had documented sixty three of them, only 17.3%!  That was it!  Maybe I was too lazy, or forgot to compose a jar entry from time to time. Or maybe I didn’t consider it noteworthy enough.

 My gratitude jar taught me a lesson. So often we focus on the negative instances in our lives and we forget the good moments. As I reread the entries something became clear.  The memories recorded on the slips of paper were not about material possession but rather connections; connections with people, places and synchronistic happenings. These slips of paper contained breadth of life and when exposed to the air their vibrancy was restored. The richness of life is not about the trips you take, the meals you consume or the wealth you amass.  It is about the ability each of us possesses to positively affect one another.  That is real wealth.